Hellgate as a paranormal emotive touchpoint

Could this be a paranormal emotive touchpoint? Maybe that’s why I feel so upset and weird there.

Expanded in [[ 2023-03-30 weird words writing group ]]; should expand further into a [[ daily blog post ]]:

I was watching a video by Amanda Paulson about the paranormal emotive touchpoint, and it really made me think of my experiences at the Hell Gate. I wonder if all of the death there, as well as the explosions that destroyed the rocks at the bottom of the river, wore the veil thin a bit, or in Amanda’s words, created a sort of soft place.

If that’s the case, though, I wonder why more people don’t feel bad in that park? Are they just less sensitive? It seems hard to believe that I could be more sensitive than other people (I always think of myself like I’m as mundane as mud), but maybe I’m sensing something that not everyone is aware of. Naturally, maybe some other people notice but just ignore it. Many people go to the park with a group of people, to hang out or work out or to let their kids play at the playground or swim at the pool. So maybe if you feel bad, you wouldn’t want to end things by just going away because you get a bad vibe. Then again, maybe the presence of other people is distracting or cheering enough that it helps to soften the emotions at the touchpoint.

I do notice that when I go to the park with a friend, I don’t feel as bad. I’m not sure if I’m distracted enough to not pick up on anything, or what. It’s only when I’m alone that a deep, terrible depression descends on me out of nowhere. It feels fucking awful, physical and visceral and very real. It’s a dark cloud that makes me feel very lonely and very alone. It’s always a very sudden feeling. And it’s strange, because the park is so beautiful. Though also it’s strange, since there are two bridges over it, looming and liminal, one of which is constantly full of cars. And it’s on the river, which transports people.

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